Band of Brothers and the Circle of Trust

By J William DeMarco

“Integrity is the basis of trust, which is not so much an ingredient of leaderships as it is a product. It is the one quality that cannot be acquired but must be earned. It is given by co-workers, and without it a leader cannot function.” – Warren Bennis

Those who I work with are quite familiar with “DeMarco Banter.” To the un-indoctrinated it may seem like a bunch of random bumper stickers, but these are things that I have learned through life that–although may appear simple at first–are quite deep and and sometimes complicated.

A favorite is: IT’S ALL ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS

AND…if you really distill relationships down…it’s all about trust, not leadership…not strategy, not vision, funding, austerity….if you don’t have trust…you really have nothing…zero…zip…nada…

Developing trust is like construction a building or making deposits in a mutual fund (with penalties for early withdrawal). It takes time, and must be done one piece or one deposit at a time. As it is with construction it is much easier to tear something down than to build it up…but if the foundation is strong there is a good chance the building or relationship will last.

In the military we see…people that trust each other completely…these friendships last a lifetime and can be one of the most rewarding relationships in life. I have witnessed this in our relationship with the 100th Bomb Group (our namesake) from WWII. When these men are together you can see the trust, the love, the friendship in their eyes…even though it may have been year since they shook hands.

It is so with Citadel Grads…maybe it is the honor code, or the shared experience of the 4th class system…but we trust each other completely even when it is the first time we have met.

If you have deep relationships…if you are trustWORTHY, the sky is the limit….

“A blessed thing it is for any man or woman to have a friend, one human soul whom we can trust utterly, who knows the best and worst of us and who loves us in spite of all our faults.” –Charles Kingsley